Bad News

We just got back from our appointment with Dr. Nestor. The PET scan results confirm what I suspected from the increased CEA number and the pain that I've been feeling in my bones for about a week. The PET scan showed renewed cancer activity in my bones in multiple locations. The activity level is lower than it was in June, when I was hospitalized, but much higher than it was in August, when it was almost undetectable. This is obviously disappointing but not surprising. We were hoping for a longer period of inactivity, but we only got about seven weeks since my last full chemo in late September. I'm not happy about this news, but I don't feel too bad, because I've been mentally preparing for this possibility all week, although of course hoping for better news. The Avastin only was obviously not sufficient to keep the cancer down, although who knows whether it would have cropped up again anyway if I had continued with the full chemo regimen. But I don't feel that was really an option anyway, because the fatigue had become so bad that it was really pointless to continue. So I'm perfectly at peace with my decisions. I was able to take and enjoy my trip to San Francisco, which was really wonderful. I think of it happily pretty much every day.

I am still planning to take my trip to North Carolina, leaving tomorrow (Saturday) and returning late Wednesday. I will bring plenty of pain meds and it should be fine. I'm not worried about it. I'm just glad I decided to go sooner rather than later. I will see my best friend Eric and his wife Meredith and their kids Joaquin and Lucy and Eric's sister Abby and her husband Mike and their son Elijah and Eric's mom Joyce (his dad Joel is working in Prague). Eric and I have tickets to the Duke game against Miami of Ohio (where my former master's student Joel is now getting his PhD) on Tuesday night. We may also try to get tickets to their game against Princeton on Sunday night (their season opener). Duke will probably crush both opponents, but I'm looking forward to witnessing the atmosphere at Cameron. There aren't many teams that would be competitive with Duke (ranked #1 in the preseason, defending national champs, and arguably more talented this season).

In other news, the Parkes (Michael, Teresa, and their son Will) came over last night for dinner and to watch the Celtics (who beat the Heat in Miami). Michael is also a Celtics fan. I am planning (hoping) to co-coach basketball with Michael at the YMCA again this January and February. Will and Seth will be on the team again. My mom made a delicious Indian dinner for us all. I gave Seth the gift I got him in San Francisco - a kit with which you can make various solar-powered contraptions. Seth and Will had fun building with that. I also gave Seth the iPad which my friends Deepak and Shareen very generously gave him. I loaded Labyrinth and a race car app on it and Seth enjoyed those.

Today I played basketball at the university - three games of full court. I played full court Monday, Wednesday, and Friday this week, which would be a good week even before my illness. I rewarded myself with a Acai smoothie, as I usually do.

Unfortunately, I may not be able to enjoy smoothies much longer. Dr. Nestor recommended that I try the FOLFOX chemo regimen. One of the side effects is peripheral neuropathy (numbness, tingling, and/or burning sensation in extremities) and painful sensitivity to cold, including cold beverages. I haven't decided whether I want to do that. I will take the weekend to think about it.

Miles has been very fun to cuddle with this week.

OK, I'm going to eat dinner and then go play poker - that should be fun and take my mind off things.

Ethan